(Dan here…op-ed lifted from Robert’s Stochastic Thoughts, written before coffee on a Sunday morning and feeling older I bet.  Thinking of older, my first computer was a Commodore 128, which isn’t even a minimum RAM amount on my Kindle much less my phone.  Still, I like my two year old basic laptop and a stripped down Windows 10 for personal use.  My wife has an Apple product.  I control my e-mail by being a curmudgeon, which I find much more efficient than any filters I have used. There are disadvantages to this approach.)


I am typing on my mom’s computer. She introduced me to personal computers (some time ago). She was fairly fluent in DOS (explanatory. not for kids these days — never mind you wouldn’t believe what people used to put up with). She basically stopped using her computer for anything but e-mail due to the Windows 8 catastrophe. I personally kept using Windows 7 as long as I could. Windows 10 is OK, because it can be set to act like Windows 95- Windows 7 (also known as pretty much the Mac user interface with just enough differences to win the look and feel the lawsuit). There must have been a Windows 9, but I don’t want to know about it.Mom has ceased to use e-mail. The problem is that her AOL inbox is always full of spam. There oughta be a law, actually two.


1) By law, if there is an e-mail list, there must be a prominently displayed one-click unsubscribe button. It must appear before the body of the e-mail. It must be in the largest font used anywhere in the e-mail. I am here blogging because I am sick and tired of scrolling down to fine “unsubscribe” at the end of a long unsolicited e-mail. More importantly, it must be one click and your done. I have found that clicking unsubscribe often takes me to a page where I am invited to subscribe and if I just click through I am not unsubscribed. To unsubscribe I have to scroll down again. Also it not allowed to ask people why they unsubscribed.

The penalty should be $10 per violation. This will bankrupt all non compliant spammers. The Justice Department or any user with a valid complaint can bring suit. If the suit is started by a harmed person, that person gets 10% of the fine for the public service. I mean, don’t members of Congress get spam ? I guess they also send a lot of spam, but they can exempt themselves from the law.

2) no more than 1000 unsolicited e-mails a year allowed. This is a limit on any entity which sends e-mails which is defined as the beneficial owner of the sending e-mail account. Spam does not have to be legal. Spam doesn’t even have to be. We are bombarded with ads on the web all the time. Most are not spam e-mail and most don’t create trouble. This is law 2, because I fear my mom accidentally subscribed to the spam mailing lists.

3) “no reply” e-mails are not allowed. The Postal Service will not deliver a letter without a return address. E-mail always includes the address of the sender. Many senders write “do not reply to this e-mail”. That should be a civil offence and also a tort costing $1000 for every e-mail which contains that text or text to that effect. If someone sends an e-mail, that person should be required to consider replies. For example “don’t e-mail me again” should be an order which must be obeyed, also if it is sent as a reply e–mail. Failure to obey such an instruction should cost $10,000 per infraction.

If the e-mailers says it would be an extremely burdensome expense to hire people just to read replies to our e-mail, it should be politely explained to them that this is exactly the point. They should not be able to burden others with e-mail without being burdened by the replies. This one was almost too obvious to include (it is an update). I think it is perfectly reasonable for me to be able to reply to an e-mail which says “do not reply”. I also think the reply should be “you now owe me $1000.00 credit my account number N at bank with routing number M (N and M not for blogger, because even though my bank has security which makes online banking impractical for me, kidz theze dayz probably know how to use those numbers to take my money). Sending an e-mail which includes the order “do not reply to this e-mail” is unacceptably rude and should be illegal. Why is it allowed

This post isn’t supposed to be an anti Microsoft rant, but just one little paragraph. Their problem is that they make profits too easily. With Windows and Office, it’s as if they patented the alphabet or Arabic numbers or something. They could just coast forever. But they won’t. So they attempted to engulf the whole software industry, got nailed by the Justice Department and saved by the Supreme Court in the Microsoft relevant case of Bush V Gore. They aren’t doing that any more (Bill Gates decided to fight viruses, bacteria and protazoans not people and so long as he focuses his ruthless determination on single celled organisms I support him).

But they won’t admit that they are just an intellectual property scam, so they keep “improving” their software making it worse and worse. This forces customers to learn how to use the new software which can’t be as familiar as the old software, and so must be less user friendly (especially the “user friendly” aspects like remember that damn paper clip with eyes ?). Also it is slow. There is a race as the hardware gets better and better and the software gets worse and worse. I am quite sure this is deliberate (and logical). The latest software makes the latest hardware run so slowly that it is barely tolerable. So you can steal it and install it on your old computer, but you don’t want to, because then your old computer is intolerably slow.

The ancestor to the computer on which I am typing, which lived on this very desk, was killed by a (legal) upgrade from Windows 3.1 to Windows 95. There is a law, call it More’s law, that no matter how powerful the hardware gets, it always takes the same amount of time for personal computers to start up. Notice that it takes no time for smart phones to start up. Why ? OK also the format of. say *.doc files’ is changed (unless people know about save but most don’t) so you need the latest applications to edit documents, so you need the latest operating system so Windows is rich. OK fine, make sure software runs only on new computers bought with Windows pre-installed. But please slow it down by using it to mine BitCoin for Microsoft or something and leave the user interface alone.